The Rock & Roll Chef®

Labels: online video retailer program, sal's beverage world, schaefer's wines, totally chipotle

Labels: chipotle bbq sauce, chipotle bloody mary mix, chipotle ketchup, chipotle wing sauce, mark battrell, totally chipotle

After driving to Chicago to do a sold-out show at the Woodstock Opera House last Saturday (big big fun), I trucked it back to Nashville to finish up some things, and rolled over to my pal Tim Beattie's east Nashville place for some food & drinks.

It was a pleasant surprise to see Brad Cotter there - they'd been shooting some "unplugged" live music video earlier that day. I think one reason Tim is good friends with Brad & myself: I see some distinct similarities between us. Another thing: Brad is ONE funny dude, and we laughed our asses off.

Among other things we discussed, I pointed out that there are many many many folks in this world who would love nothing better than to hang out with some seasoned industry veterans like Brad, Tim & myself, get a "peek behind the curtain," get their input on an original song or two, play some tunes, and hear some of these very very funny and (sadly for this piece), completely unrepeatable things that were some of the highlights of the night. The music industry may totally suck a lot of the time, but one thing that makes it somewhat bearable: the musicians themselves are some of the most entertaining humans on the planet.

I will share this "insiders' secret" with the world: as with most of the musicians and creative people I know, most of the conversation covered "been there/done that" scenarios, online marketing, social media, and blogs (including this one). Translated: How to make money from one's art. But actual discussion of the music itself is probably the smallest part of the dialogue.

I will say that Brad is one tough sell for "outside the box" concepts, and he can point/counterpoint with the best of them. I can imagine there's not much he hasn't seen, pitched or been pitched by some very savvy, slick, sharp operators, so it's hard not to be cynical in the middle of very cynical business (again, he reminds me of me).

That said, I'm thinking the trick is this: In a way, you have to forget your past success (or near-success); you have to stop beating yourself up and 2nd-guessing why something that seemed like a sure solid thing melted like cheap chocolate in your hand; You have to have the vision & courage to reinvent yourself. In Brad's case, I'm thinking he needs to acknowledge his true nature as an artist and person.

From what I'm discovering, it seems the whole gospel/Christian/Nashville Star perception/branding for Brad Cotter has been like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole - it's not who he really is. If Brad had enjoyed more success in that genre, I also think it was only going to be a matter of time before he lit the dynamite, bit the hand that fed him and blew it all up anyway - but on a bigger level. What's that quote from Benjamin Franklin?: "A house divided unto itself cannot stand?"

If I were his PR agent, I'd definitely push the darker/funnier/authentic side of this artist; and I'd focus on getting him on camera ASAP, interviewing other stars (he'd be great at it). Assuming he got some traction as an on-camera personality with the right format, I'm thinking getting folks out to pay for his shows, selling CDs, merch, etc. would be a slam dunk. (are you listening, Mr. Cotter?!?!?!?) Maybe we'll even see him again tonight for some video/cooking/music at Beattie's...

Labels: brad cotter, nashvillle star, Tim Beattie, totally chipotle

MEET HARTLEY PEAVEY, founder & owner of Peavey Electronics. As a long-time user & owner of Peavey products (just like thousands- if not millions - of other musicians), I was already very familiar with his products; I've used a tweed Blues Classic 50 with one 15" speaker for years.

What I didn't know was how funny & entertaining he was, how anti-corporate/conglomerate, and how charged up I got being around someone who's had such a huge influence on the music industry. Oh, and he digs Mexican food (truth is, I probably wouldn't have gotten the interview without handing over some Totally Chipotle products).

Labels: hartley peavey, namm 2009, peavey, rock n roll chef, totally chipotle

Finally got approval on some video I produced as a barter with Larry Aldag at the Il Dept Of Agriculture. Long story short: As a food manufacturer (Totally Chipotle), I'm always hearing from them about participating in trade shows, buyer's missions, etc - but there's not a lot of content to give a clear picture of what's waiting there. And so... In return for a booth space at their show, I offered to produce a quickie video, to be featured on the Dept Of Ag website. Although it's admittedly not real fancy, I'm not sure if there's any other video on their site yet. Discuss....


Il Dept Of Agriculture Food Show | Oct 2008 from Rocknrollchef on Vimeo.

Labels: drury lane, illinois department of agriculture, larry aldag, totally chipotle

ANYBODY ELSE OUT THERE HEARD OF HEATHER B. ARMSTRONG & DOOCE.COM? I can't say I would have ever thought twice about visiting her blog in a "normal" flow of events, but I happened to see her featured on a national TV segment (ABC's Nightline, I think), and she looked like a complete star to me - fun, a little wild, brilliant, profane, free-form, ex-Mormon, entertaining. I also thought they mentioned developing a movie around her? Who knows about that, but I do know TV producers pretty much can't seem to operate without putting labels on people or situations to function, and they call her a "mommy blogger." Pretty funny - however limiting. Calling her that is like calling me a line cook - just a tiny, tiny, tiny part of the bigger story. I'm sure there's plenty of women out there with kids who like to blog, and that's all well and good; But unless she was the standout writer she is, there's no way her being a "mommy blogger" would ever get her noticed by visitors and advertisers. Advertisers with lots of money willing to pay to get next to those who visit her site.

Unlike other folks I've met along the way and picked for stardom before anyone else, Heather is no "early pick" by me: She mentioned on air TV that, based on a million unique visitors a month to her site (wow), she makes $40k A MONTH (at least, that's what I think she said. DAMN GIRL). A million different people want to read what she writes, every month. So why am I writing about her?

I sent her some of my Totally Chipotle products, less than a month ago. Today, I get a hand-written postcard from her, which totally surprised me, and also reveals what a geek I am: Being in the professions I am (food, music, entertainment, marketing), it's EXTREMELY rare for anyone to say thank you, return a phone call, express gratitude for anything I do, say thank you when they make money directly from my work & connections (did I mention my love/hate position on musicians?). And so, to have someone I KNOW is busier than hell and getting bombarded frequently with solicitions, mail, TV offers, live appearance dates, etc., get back to me, got to me. In a good way. Here's an excerpt: "... cannot wait to try the bloody mary mix, coincidence that that has become one of my favorite drinks. Much love from Utah, Heather B. Armstrong." Yes, it would be sweet if she liked the stuff enough to give it a mention on her site... Beyond all that, I was already a fan; Here's some content from her website, in case you'd like to see for yourself what I see:

My name is Heather B. Armstrong. Some of you may remember me as Heather B. Hamilton. I am married to a charming geek named Jon. We live in Salt Lake City, Utah, with our four-year-old daughter, Leta Elise, and our six-year-old SuperMutt, Chuck, and a ten-month-old miniature Australian Shepherd, Coco. The chaos in our house is unreal.

I am a Stay at Home Mom (SAHM) or a Shit Ass Ho Motherfucker. I do both equally well.

In a previous life I was a web designer. I lived in Los Angeles, California, for several years where I worked for drug-addicted executives and discovered what life was like as a recovering Mormon. This means that life was filled with PowerPoint templates and lethal amounts of tequila. I dated several actors and met a handful of celebrities. Everything you've ever heard about Los Angeles is absolutely true, especially the parts about traffic and actors: they really are that bad.

I grew up in a small suburb of Memphis, Tennessee, and graduated valedictorian of Bartlett High School in 1993. The reason I am telling you about the valedictorian part is because being able to say, "I was the valedictorian" is the only privilege I ever got in life from achieving that goal. No one ever hired me because I was valedictorian. The lesson to be learned from this is: AIM LOW. Save yourself the time.

My parents raised me Mormon, and I grew up believing that the Mormon Church was true. In fact, I never had a cup of coffee until I was 23-years-old. I had pre-marital sex for the first time at age 22, but BY GOD I waited an extra year for the coffee. There had better be a special place in heaven for me.

I attended BYU from 1993-1997 and graduated with a degree in English. I firmly believe that BYU is the most horrible place on Earth, worse even than Disneyland. The one skill I learned in college that serves me well now is not how to solve differential equations or how to write a paper deconstructing The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, it's how to distrust organized religion. I am no longer a practicing Mormon or someone who believes that Rush Limbaugh speaks to God. My family is understandably disappointed.

I started this website in February 2001. A year later I was fired from my job for this website because I had written stories that included people in my workplace. My advice to you is BE YE NOT SO STUPID. Never write about work on the internet unless your boss knows and sanctions the fact that YOU ARE WRITING ABOUT WORK ON THE INTERNET. If you are the boss, however, you should be aware that when you order Prada online and then talk about it out loud that you are making it very hard for those around you to take you seriously.

This website chronicles my life from a time when I was single and making a lot of money as a web designer in Los Angeles, to when I was dating the man who would become my husband, to when I lost my job and lived life as an unemployed drunk, to when I married my husband and moved to Utah, to when I became pregnant, to when I threw up and became unbearably swollen during the pregnancy, to the birth, to the aftermath, to the postpartum depression that landed me in a mental hospital. I'm better now.

In October 2005 I began running enough ads on this website that my husband was able to quit his job and become a Stay at Home Father (SAHF) or a Shit Ass Ho Fuckingbadass. He takes both very seriously. This website now supports my family.

I love bourbon, chips and salsa, Britpop, and television that excels at being really awful.

Labels: dooce.com, heather b. armstrong, totally chipotle

As of right now, it's probably too soon to put any judgements on the outcome of this "Back To Oklahoma" trip (I was born there).

Some things do stand out, though: Truly severe weather, truly hot women, some great connections & new pals, my Totally Chipotle products getting rave reviews, some big liars and out-and-out thieves, totally shallow & transparent scammer/party chicks, some nice small-town folks, dreaded small-town cops, narcissists and egomaniacs, well-dressed losers, casually dressed multi-millionaires - all in full view backstage from behind my custom kitchen flight case, at the mercy of the weather and flow of the people.

More later, but meantime, check out an all-girl band with a great name, whom I met just after a very bad moment (for them). I liked them a lot, and hope they go big soon: COCKPIT!

Labels: cockpit, cooking al fresco, rocklahoma 2008, totally chipotle

A REAL BUSY WEEK OR SO, BUT IT'S BEEN FUN. Since last week, I've shot 3 separate cooking demos; I did manage to edit one as somewhat presentable.

I've been looking far & wide for something - anything - that resembles a respectable kid's cooking show. It's a wasteland, and that's both bad & good.

It's bad, because it's going to be a real uphill battle to try and pioneer kid's cooking lessons that aren't incredibly lame, condescending, patronizing and downright annoying. And is there some rule that says the music for these things also has to be lame as hell?

It's good for the same reason: Anything halfway decent will stand WAY out.

And so... my 8 year-old niece Hannah was in town over spring break, and we decided to have some fun with the Canon GL2 camera I'm using. Hannah is the perfect kid's cooking student: Fun, funny, fearless, smart, a real fast learner and a gamer. We shot line by line, and as she'd never done anything like this before, I think it came out pretty well.

Although we know there are lots of "grown ups" who're gonna freak, wait 'till they see the full-on "how to use a knife" demo we shot, too...

Labels: kids cooking show, rock n roll kitchen, totally chipotle